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Texts and photographs if not otherwise stated: Copyright © 2011/2012 censorshipofmyskin.blogspot.com
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Sunday, 30 December 2012

In-between days/daze




I have to apologize, again. I hope you had a wonderful Christmas and or happy holidays, I haven’t been here for over a month, due to flu, fever, and a very very serious case of social media phobia. As if social phobia wasn’t enough. I have got social media phobia. Has anyone of you ever considered that it has almost become impossible to re-invent yourself? Major anxiety source here.
I am really lonely i said to someone (gasp! I actually spoke to a person) and the reaction was, „Oh, L.!I am not surprised, I mean you are not even on facebook“

I don’t like drugs. Never did. But sometimes I have the suspicion I will end up sitting in front of some 10th generation tablet in 10 years time, injecting adrenalin (epinephrine i know, my doctor friends) about every ten minutes. (yes, heartfailure fully taken into consideration)

I hate if people tell me to get less stressed. I wonder if anyone knows what i mean when i say NO STRESS is the biggest stress I can possibly have.

Hand me the syringe (no I am not a drug user, I have never been and I am not intending to become one, this is a METHAPHOR) - oh, adrenaline my peaceful pink fluffy heaven.

Laters.

If not – Happy new year. I love you, you who still hang around, believe it or not.

If I would not be a girl and this species would not have been extinct ages ago, one could really call me an angry young man.
Posted by Loulou at 13:34

16 comments:

  1. love you, lou
    ps: i'm sorry i wrote you and then never responded, i promise i will, x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies

    1. totally understand, happens to me as well!
      Happy happy new year, hope for you to blog again soon!!i really like your words&atmospheres!!

      xxxxxxx
      love you

      Delete

  2. I hope you had a happy and peaceful Christmas Loulou, you deserve it

    And here's hoping 2013 is a better year for all of us

    You are a beautiful soul Loulou and I am blesses to have met you
    You are precious, don't ever forget that

    Love ya x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies

    1. I believe it will be a challenging but wonderful year, you are a fragile but brave fighter, and i am happy to have met you, too!

      xxx

      Delete

  3. I hate when people tell me to smile. It is far more likely to trigger the opposite.

    Happy New Year!
    xx
    Lulu
    Breakfast After 10

    ReplyDelete
    Replies

    1. isn't it awful when people who don't even know us assume to know whats best for us???

      HAPPY NEW YEAR,
      Lulu!!

      Delete

  4. All I wanted to do is curl up on the couch and entangled with with the one person I can't seem to get out of my head, sadly I spent half the time worrying if that was enough for her. I don't think it was without her drug of choice. Now I'm curled up alone again..naturally. The adrenaline just keeps us doing what we have to do to survive. I hate surviving.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies

    1. well i am sorry to hear that, but i think the adrenaline keeps you doing what you have to do to survive.

      It might not be, not: it IS NOT the same for everyone, i i.e. need it to feel alive.

      Delete

  5. Amazing blog :) I follow You now and I hope that you like my blog too! Have a great day ❤

    xx San☽
    owlspassion.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete

  7. I hope you are alright now, Lou. Winter fevers are the worst thing on 'snowy countries' I guess. Oh! And I don't think society could ever be any less frightening. :< Being on facebook and not talking with anyone is much worse than not being on it. Gah!

    I love you. Happy New Year, lovely <3

    ReplyDelete

  9. :) Frohes neues Jahr auch! Manchmal rede ich fremde Leute auf der Straße an (aber nicht gerade in Kleinstädten) einfach nur um mich wieder bescheuert echt zu fühlen. Kalt is hier immer noch, las aber dein Kommentar in Vegas, da wars aber auch kalt irgendwie. Wüsten-dings halt. Gefühlte Identitätskonstrukte gehen ja auch ohne social media, aber warte, hast du jetzt Angst davor das nicht mehr machen zu können oder zu viel machen zu können?

    Ein guter "Ich press dir diese Atmosphäre auf"-Film ist dieser hier, z.Z. wirklich mein Lieblingsfilm, empfehle ich allen Leuten, richtig grandioooos: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuLLC5EcqLQ

    Liebe und Wärme nach zu dir, wo auch immer!

    ReplyDelete

  10. my anwser here: richmond park looked perfect for riding horses, sounds like fun.
    you´re right I should stop thinking like a german, is better without fear.
    welches art college hast du den besuchst, ich finde hier nämlich nicht so richtig das richtige, muss aber was tun?
    love
    and you shouldn´t be lonely, such a wonderful artistgirl like you

    ReplyDelete

  11. I really love your writing. Please don't ever stop.

    ReplyDelete

  12. *If I weren't a girl and this species hadn't become extinct ... Nichts fuer ungut ;)

    ReplyDelete

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